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Enrollment is now open at the most prestigious fake Ivy League school you’ve never heard of: Serious Goose University.
Founded in 2025, SGU offers a world-class curriculum in Advanced Honking, Goose Law (don’t test it), and Competitive Paddle Sports.
Perfect for alumni of the streets and future PhDs in keeping it serious, this heavyweight tee proves you made the Dean’s List in not messing around.
Rock it on campus, in the gym, or while chasing bread at the pond—no application fee required.
• 50% cotton, 50% polyester
• Fabric weight: 5.5 oz./yd.² (186 g/m²)
• DryBlend® moisture-management fabric
• Modern classic fit
• Rib collar in classic width
• Taped neck and shoulders for comfort and durability
• Tear-away label for 0 chafing
Age restrictions: For adults
EU Warranty: 2 years
In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Knotty Intentions and SINDEN VENTURES LIMITED ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at gpsr@sindenventures.com. You can also write to us at PO Box 371
Dennis, MA 02638 or Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus.
Serious Goose University: Where Majors Include Honkonomics & Paddle Science
$14.95
Reliable shipping
Flexible returns
Founded in 2025, SGU offers a world-class curriculum in Advanced Honking, Goose Law (don’t test it), and Competitive Paddle Sports.
Perfect for alumni of the streets and future PhDs in keeping it serious, this heavyweight tee proves you made the Dean’s List in not messing around.
Rock it on campus, in the gym, or while chasing bread at the pond—no application fee required.
• 50% cotton, 50% polyester
• Fabric weight: 5.5 oz./yd.² (186 g/m²)
• DryBlend® moisture-management fabric
• Modern classic fit
• Rib collar in classic width
• Taped neck and shoulders for comfort and durability
• Tear-away label for 0 chafing
Age restrictions: For adults
EU Warranty: 2 years
In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Knotty Intentions and SINDEN VENTURES LIMITED ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at gpsr@sindenventures.com. You can also write to us at PO Box 371
Dennis, MA 02638 or Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus.
Size guide
| LENGTH (inches) | CHEST (inches) | SLEEVE LENGTH (inches) | |
| S | 28 | 34-37 | 15 ⅝ |
| M | 29 | 38-41 | 17 |
| L | 30 | 42-45 | 18 ½ |
| XL | 31 | 46-49 | 20 |
| 2XL | 32 | 50-53 | 21 ½ |
| 3XL | 33 | 54-57 | 22 ¾ |
| 4XL | 34 | 58-61 | 24 ¼ |
| 5XL | 35 | 62-65 | 25 ¼ |
| LENGTH (cm) | CHEST (cm) | SLEEVE LENGTH (cm) | |
| S | 71.1 | 86.4-94 | 39.7 |
| M | 73.7 | 96.5-104.1 | 43.2 |
| L | 76.2 | 106.7-114.3 | 47 |
| XL | 78.7 | 116.8-124.5 | 50.8 |
| 2XL | 81.3 | 127-134.6 | 54.6 |
| 3XL | 83.8 | 137.2-144.8 | 58 |
| 4XL | 86.4 | 147.3-155 | 61.5 |
| 5XL | 89 | 157.5-165 | 64.3 |